June 14, 2021

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Biden says he underestimated Trump’s ability to spread ‘the big lie’

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COVID-19 has dropped to levels in the U.S. not seen since last summer, Jimmy Fallon cheered on Monday’s Tonight Show, co-hosted with Foo Fighters frontman Dave Grohl. “Pretty soon the only place you’ll see Dr. Fauci is popping out of a costume on The Masked Singer,” Fallon joked. “Right now the CEO of Purell and the CEO of Zoom are just holding each other, crying.”

“There’s good news about COVID in the U.S. pretty much everywhere you look,” Stephen Colbert said at The Late Show, but the news he was most excited about was the return of his live audience on June 14.

Meanwhile, “Alabama has lifted its ban on yoga in public schools,” Colbert said. Alabama banned yoga nearly 30 years ago “because apparently, some Christians were afraid that yoga would open the door for people to be converted to Hinduism,” he said. Late Show writer Pratima Mani zoomed in to explain why Alabama was right. “Everyone is at all times one down dog away from accepting Vishnu into their hearts,” she joked. “I mean, it’s already working. Haven’t you noticed aging hipsters everywhere wearing shirts that say ‘Nirvana’?” Colbert said he’s pretty sure they mean the ’90s band — “who then reincarnated into the Foo Fighters,” Mani pointed out. “Mystic forces at play!”

Jimmy Kimmel turned to Florida, where a high school near Jacksonville altered the yearbook photos of 80 female students to cover up their shoulders and chests. “It’s like they put the Taliban in charge of the yearbook committee,” he said on Kimmel Live. “Imagine some lunatic spending all that time photoshopping high school girls’ boobs out of the book.”

COVID-19 cases are dropping so fast, soon “we’ll need a new excuse to not want to see people,” Kimmel said. Republicans are doing their part to keep vaccination rates down, however: Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) says he probably won’t get inoculated, and Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.) compared the House’s renewed mask mandate “to — that’s right, you guessed it — the Holocaust,” he sighed. “Where the hell are those Jewish space lasers when you need them?”

“As a general rule — and this goes for everyone — don’t compare anything to the Holocaust, ever,” Seth Meyers suggested at Late Night. He compared Greene to “the lady at the PTA meeting who argues that math violated the Constitution,” then explained how COVID-19 spreads and why vaccines are so crucial. Watch below. Peter Weber

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